Friday Night Fights — Uppercut!!! Round 5

Announcer: Doctor K.’s bringing the 100 — funk waitin’ for you to get it on your own, the doctor is gonna deliver it to ya!!!
Announcer: Playin’ his best Dudley Do-Right, Engblom says take a hike!!! and don’t forget the trailmix — SNITCH!!!
Announcer: WickedJuan’s new political platform is Funk all that bickerin’-beef!!! when he starts separatin’ the weak from the obsolete!!!
Announcer: Starting his own ass-whoopin’ fast-food chain, Fortress Keeper is all about the high-fructose induced pain when he peels more skins than an idaho potato!!!
Announcer: Siskoid is playin’ it like Destiny’s Child, ending your fate, like a higher power!!!
Announcer: You can’t take a bite out of the Hero Sandwich because he’s bound to make your skin chafe like a rash while leavin’ big welts on your ass!!!
Announcer: Forever claimin’ ol-sk00l, n3w sk00l!!!, Munson says you better learn or he’ll burn-baby-burn like a disco inferno!!!
Announcer: The battle is on!!! and if you walk through Destiny’s Garden you’ll hear him screaming the fight song, just before he beats that ass like Tyson!!!
Announcer: Comics Ate his Brain, but, you ain’t phasing the amazing because while your guns are raising he’s already two guns blazing!!!
Announcer: Harry Potter might not come out swingin’ with Fish Flavored Baseball Bats so skip the bull and lock your doors because Erich is bringing the heat like a matador!!!
Announcer: Ninja Shark Bites is playin’ the charts like the Beatles — so you better adapt to loss while he toasts champagne over the death of everyone!!!
Announcer: It’s retro when Ewing is lookin’ at your style and the way fighters sweat him, but the big question is you feelin’ the pain in his ultimate message?!?
Announcer: Everyones running on The Comic Treadmill but funk fistfights and lame scuffles, watch out before you socked in the face and kicked in the calf muscles!!!
Announcer: Phoning It In long distance and collectin’ divends from everyones ass, don’t accept any calls, because bodies are droppin’ like a crazed man goin’ postal!!!
Announer: Vaklam is gonna flip like an acrobat to keep the bastards back and let em’ know where his head is at!!!
Announcer: It’s all Secrets and Lies when the Cheetahmaster decides to start killin’ and gettin’ away with murder just like an unsolved mystery!!!
Announcer: These are the dog years you won’t shed livin’ on PlanetX, and it wouldn’t save your life when he’d rather make you dead!!!
Announcer: Pullin’ out favorites from Dave’s Longbox, it’s black pain fallin’ from the sky like rain and the punches are red hot while you’re suckin’ on flames!!!
Announcer: Bitter Andrew says you’re about to be a bloody mess when your head is throbbin’ and he ain’t even hit you yet!!!
Announcer: With a formation of words that fit Woody hits like the detention school teacher that disturbs you with combinations you haven’t even heard of!!!
Announcer: Great Caesars Post is on his’ p’s and q’s — to step in his shoes, you’re gonna pay your painful dues!!!
Announcer: Beware the Ronin Marketeer and stand down because the first chump that jumps is the first chump that dies!!!
Announcer: Collected Editions boxes with a flow that slows like molasses, leavin’ the crowd trippin’ like he was John the Baptist!!!
Announcer: Bacardi is real when he packs steel, screamin’ every man for himself!!! and issuing no love in the battlefield!!!
Announcer: Skywritin’ her name as r-i-p, Kalinara completes the sentence when she busts that dome on your headstone and it reads — he died, chokin’ on my fist!!!
Announcer: Diamondrock is the next sound you hear and he brings fear that could be devastating to your ears!!!
Announcer: Ragnell’s definition is assassin for hire, killin’ on multiple passports that will never expire!!!
Announcer: Never obscene, Bully can make you out of sync, out of order — like shuffled pieces of a puzzle, in the land of the unseen, he’s the hand that brings the BIG trouble!!!
Announcer: In the game of life, it’s hard to roll a double — Dorian in these trying times is taking lives and separates you like a mistress to a couple!!!
Announcer: There’s no easy way out and no shortcut home screams Sims when you’re torn off the page like a paper champion!!!
Announcer: Coming correct with the torture, Church makes blood flow like bodies of water, screaming hot-murder like a step-son verbally assaultin’ his fake father!!!


July 21st, 2007 at 7:22 am
It’s growing out of control!
July 21st, 2007 at 9:37 am
John — no doubt!!!
Everyone should also get down with this special late night entry from contender Mozzocco where Everyday is like Wednesday!!!
July 21st, 2007 at 5:13 pm
This week was bloody well HUGE!!! Screw Marvel, Friday Night Fights is cracking the internet in HALF!!!!!
July 23rd, 2007 at 3:16 pm
Friday night fights is coming at you like a runaway planet! And just when you thought you could escape… MC CHRIS IN YOUR GRILL!!!
Frugal with my dookie, indeed.
July 23rd, 2007 at 10:09 pm
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